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The Swedish Candy Incident
On Paul's 24th Birthday, a few of us got together to celebrate. Towards the end
of the evening, Emily reminded Paul that he hadn't tried the candy she had given
him from her mother earlier that day. She bought him a little box of Swedish
candy, knowing he had some wierd idea against Swedish products (I have no idea
what the deal is with this, I only found out because of this incident). So he
is a little hesitant to try this candy. He offeres one to Scott to try first.
Scott pops one in his mouth and gives us one of the most disgusted faces I've
ever seen on a person!
So, Scott does a typical "guy" thing. He yells out, "This is disgusting! Here,
try one!" Then Paul does an equally typical "guy" (translation = stupid) thing.
He says "OK". And Paul pops one in his mouth! Of course, as Emily and I could
have predicted, Paul gave us an even more hideously disgusted face!
Emily and I, laughing uproariously, in severe danger of rupturing a spleen or
some other internal organ due to the extreme stress our laughter is causing,
look at each other and shake our heads in amusement and disbelief. Our immediate
reaction was to advise them to spit it out, while amazed that they tried the
candy in the first place. Then the guys do yet another typical "guy" (stupid)
thing. They decide that neither can be the first to spit it out, so they have
to keep it in their mouth until it's gone. And no biting it. It must fully
disolve in their mouth! So, after about 15 minutes of the guys shouting "Ewww!
This is disgusting!" and giving rather graphic descriptions of what they
thought the candy tasted like, the contest had a winner. Although how they
knew what bad licorice and rotten tires tasted like, I think is better left
unknown.
I'll spare you most of the details, but I will say the candy was so bad, that
it left a film on their tongues. They even tried eating very strong mints to
hide the taste but the candy covered the mint in this same strange film which
rendered it ineffective! So, after an eternity of torture, Paul finally won.
Scott made him proove he wasn't hiding it under his tongue.
Scott, unfortunately, still had his candy and it didn't show signs of disolving
anytime soon.
Finally, Scott gave up and spit the stupid thing out. Both Paul and Scott spent
the remainder of the evening wolfing down mints and drinking soda, in a vain
attempt to rid themselves of the foul taste. Eventually, Emily's mom showed up.
Remember her? She's the one who gave these candies to Paul in the first place.
So we see her drive up, and Paul says "Hey, I'm gonna thank her and get her to
try one of these things!" So she walks up the driveway and Paul says "Here,
you gotta try one of these candies you gave me!" Emily's mom immediately backs
up and says "No way!!!" It turns out, she knew all about them and gave them to
Paul on purpose, correctly guessing he would pull a stupid "guy" move and eat
the candy. But she didn't think he would actually keep the candy in his mouth
until it dissolved! I think she found it just as amusing in the retelling as
Emily, Paul's mom, and I did in the viewing!
The Inn Between © 2004
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